So, think about what you can do to take your mind off your pain and to reduce your feelings of fear and anxiety. Try to express and explore your feelings with family and friends and see if you can come to accept the aspects of your situation that you cannot change. Try to deal with your fear of the future by confronting it rather than by letting your imagination run riot. Fear feeds on the unknown. So ask a doctor, nurse, social worker or someone else you can trust about what is likely to happen to you. Ask them directly about any particular bogey you have— is it really likely to happen, and what could be done about it if it does? I am sure that if you can do this you will feel more at ease and your pain will be less of a problem for you.
If your pain proves really difficult to control, in spite of following the approaches I have recommended, think about what you are gaining from it. No, that’s not a misprint, I do mean gaining. Are you frightened of being discharged from hospital? Does the fact that you still have pain mean you can stay there, where you feel safer? Does your pain mean that you are less likely to be left on your own? If something like this is happening for you, there may be other, much less unpleasant ways of getting what you need. Perhaps you could tell friends, family, nurses, social worker, chaplain or someone else you trust just what it is you need. Perhaps you could try to work out what it is about hospital that makes it feel safer and then see what you could do to make home feel safer. Perhaps you could ask to have someone to keep you company just because you’re lonely and frightened, accepting that you don’t need to have pain to ask for this. Basically, try to ask for what you need directly instead of through your pain. You may be surprised at the results.
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